Friday, October 10, 2014

Josh Breen                                                   Breen 1
Mrs.Belden
Honors English 1
6 October 2014                  
North Korea
Luke stepped out of his silver Jeep onto the hard concrete floor. He looked around and thought to himself that he was lucky to be a U.S. citizen.  He was standing in the capital of North Korea, Pyongyang.  He walked towards his apartment building, which was a shabby brick building with 3 floors. There were several homeless men surrounding it, for this building had a caring reputation.  There was trash everywhere, and in the shadows you could see creatures with bright red meaty eyes.  Luke shivered and walked faster towards the building.  He checked in and headed up to the third floor.  His room was the third on the left.  He slid in his keycard and the door swung open.  Luke locked the door behind him and plopped on the bed.  He rested on his lap his silver brief case.  He punched in a couple numbers on the side keypad, and the front sprung open.  On the inside of the front panel was a digital screen with a keyboard adjacent to it.  He turned the laptop on.  Luke got up and checked the window.  He knew that if he was to be caught he could be arrested, or more likely, killed.  Luke logged on with his U.S. credentials.  Once getting on his account, he reviewed his mission.  It was simple, destroy a nuclear sub that would be used to attack the U.S. and return home.  Luke stared at there page for nearly 10 minutes.  He had know idea how he would get to this sub, much less destroy it.  There was a knock on the door.  Luke immediately closed the laptop and grabbed his silenced pistol.  He rested the gun behind his back as he peered through the peephole.  Outside was a italian man, tall and skinny, but at the same time you could see some upper body muscle.  Luke knew there

Breen 2
was going to be an informant waiting for him in the city, but he could not be sure this man was him. He opened the door anyways.
“Yes?” said Luke.
“Mr. Johnson, I'm afraid we don't have time for pleasantries.  May I come in?”  The italian man handed him a letter addressed to him.
Luke cautiously let the man pass into his apartment.  The man seemed tense, and a little skittish.  As he sat down, Luke opened and read the letter.  Inside was pictures of the sub and the exact location of it.  Luke knew that the time was now to destroy the sub.
“My name is Debbie.” said the man.  “I am here to help you accomplish your mission.   I have for you the c-4, which is waiting in the shed next to the docks.”
“Will you be with me?” asked Luke.
“No, I will not.  I will be watching you through my sniper rifle.  If anything goes wrong or you are captured I will shoot to kill.  We can not have sensitive data being shared with a country like North Korea.”
“I understand”  said Luke solemnly.
“Then I will leave you to contemplate the fate of your countries safety”  said Debbie.
The man briskly walked away.  Luke was left staring at the door in front of him.  He had no idea how he would be able to pull this off, much less blow up the sub.  In the letter Debbie had given to him, there was a picture and description of a man, labeled Jung Seo.  He guessed he would have to start there.  He had a lieutenant rank in the North Korean navy.  That would allow him to come to meetings with Jung and converse with him freely.
Luke got dressed and headed to the shipyard where there was a meeting scheduled at noon.  The shipyard had a military like base in the middle, which Luke was sure the meeting
Breen 3
would be at.  He headed in, only to be stopped and checked by a guard.  The guard was wearing a north korean hat and uniform.  He also had a black mustache with pale skin.  Luke was cleared and headed in to see Jung sitting down talking with his advisor.  Luke lit a smoke and pretended to look busy.  More people strolled in, and about ten minutes later, Jung stood up.
“Attention, thank you my advisors for coming here on such short notice.  As you all know, this meeting is about the imdiate launch of our nuclear sub.  The americans in the west are clearly plotting against us, and the time to stop them in there tracks is now!”  He yelled.
The Koreans all shouted and cheered.  Luke joined in.
“We will launch the full might of our navy at there western seaboard, and we, we the koreans will be the leading military.” said Jung, cheering with the crowd.
“We will destroy the puny Americans and kill their president.  We will prove to the world that we are not to be underestimated, we are to be feared!” roared Jung.
The crowd was on its feet, full out screaming and cheering.  The situation was more desire than Luke realized.  He had his silenced gun in his waistband, he could end Jungs life now.  He hesitated, he needed to befriend Jung.  Jung was sitting at a table looking at a map of the U.S.  Luke sat down and continued to tell Jung that he used to live in the U.S. and that he knew where the coast guard would be watching.  Jung questioned him at first, raising his eyebrow, but soon seemed to trust him.
 "Then its settled, we will attack the coast of Oregon." declared Jung, which was met with a cry of approval.
 "Thank you for sharing your knowledge with me Captain...?"
 "Luke" he said as Jung nodded his head.  
 
Breen 4
The meeting was soon dismissed and the launch date had been posted.  The sub was set to launch in less than 12 hours from now.  Luke knew the time to blow the submarine was going to have to be tonight.  He couldnt wait any longer.  Luke milled around for a bit, looking like a drunk soldier, untill 11 o clock.  Then he headed down to the shore, pistol in hand.  
 There it was.  The shiny alunium case of pounds of c-4.  And standing bwetween Luke and it, was a armed guard with an ak-47.  Lule aimed his pistol, and with no hesitation, shot at the guard. He went down in a dead heap.  Luke rushed over and dragged the body inti the harbor, where he knew it would degrade.  Then he took the top of the container of c-4 off and looked inside.  There was enough c-4 to blow a building down.  Luke took 5 packs and very carefully  put them in his bag.  He then steathly walked to the docks.
 As he walked he wondedred where the sniper was.  He wondered if he would come out of this alive, or with a bullet in him.  He was conviced it would be the latter one.  He had reached the docks.  Not suprisingly, it looked like everyone had gone down below to celebrate.  Luke took one c-4 and attached it to the helm of the ship.  He then walked over to the rear and attached another one.  Then he heard footsteps.  Luke sprang from his crouched postion and ran towards the boardwalk.  Someone was fast on his heals.
 Luke felt a sharp pain in his shoulder as he fell to the cobblestone.
 "I knew you wernt one of us, boy," Jung spat at him.
 "Give me the detonator or you will die.  I have already sounded the alarms and my men will be here soon.  They will not be as hesitant to end a traitors life as I am."
 Luke kicked swung his feet at Jung and swept him off his feet.  He was left in a disconfigured figure on the ground.  Luke held the gun to his head.

Breen 5
 Luke pulled out the detonator.  He knew two packages of c-4 would probaly be enough to blow the sub.  He pulled the trigger.
 "You bastard!"  Screamed Jung in a korean accent.
 "Somewhere in the distance was a large explosion.  Luke sighed.  His mission was over.  He had saved the U.S. from war and destruction.  
  Two cars came roaring up behind Jung.  At least ten armed guards came rushing out, guns pointed at Luke.
 "On the ground!" Yelled one of the maskef men.
 Luke slowley put himself on the ground.  As he did so, he noticed a figure on top of the marketing building next to him.  It was Debbie.  Luke nodded his head at him.  Debbie took a stick and pointed it at him.
 Luke spat on the ground and thougt to himself, I have served my country well.  He felt and blinding pain in his chest and fell down.

6 comments:

  1. Hey Butters B,
    I really liked some of the similes and metaphors you used. I also liked the plot to your story and how it evolved. I expectally liked the irony at the end. One question i have is was Luke's job to be a spy for the U.S.? Another question i have is Did Debbie shot Luke or did one of the other officers? One thing that i would suggest changing is think of other words to use then Luke and him.
    Nat K.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow josh, what a great story! I can tell that it was very thought out and original, and definitely not a copy of of a South Park episode. Your use of similes and metaphors were quite original, and the plot is definitely not identical to that of a South park episode. Oh and by the was Mrs. Belden, this isn't one of my blog posts, just wanted to have some fun on the blog!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sooo.. should I be worried about plagiarism? Judging from Josh's blog's background, Josh likes South Park.

      Delete
  3. Hey Josh I really liked how descriptive your story was I understood everything another I liked was how well you included all the literary elements. Lastly I really liked the hook to your story It was really interesting and made me want to read more. One question I have is who shot Luke at the end and also why did Luke become a spy. One suggestion I have is to maybe give a little more background information about Luke but that's it I enjoyed it!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I really liked your story! I love the originality of the plot. You did a great job of describing the apartment and the shipping yard. Your story hooked me right away within the first paragraph and i couldn't stop reading. One question i have is how did luke end up in north korea? my one suggestion would be to add a little background on how luke got there and what his cover was.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yesss Josh.... NICE story!! I really liked all of the similes and metaphors you used in your story. Another thing I liked about your story was the way you incorporated all tot the literary elements in your story. You didn't just stick them in just so you can get credit for them, you included them so they make your story more interesting, so I like that. The last thing that really stood out to me when I was reading your story is how well you hooked me. I have two questions, first, South Park??, and the second one is, Why did you have Luke die. The only suggestion I have is explain in more detail why you choose North Korea.

    ReplyDelete